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August 22nd, 2008

Vh1 Stop Motion Animation Fruit Commercial

I’m very excited to announce I’m directing a stop motion animation commercial for VH1. Thanks to my pal, Dax Monta, whose writing and producing. It’s due this coming Monday, so it’s going to be a hectic hectic week. The spot is for Vh1’s Labor Day Weekend and features stop motion fruit.

I’ll let you know when it starts airing. It could be as early as this coming Tuesday (the 26th) I believe.

You can contact me about it at Bobby@riggedproductions.com or visit thebobbymiller.com

July 11th, 2008

No more BLOG, go here instead

http://www.thebobbymiller.com

December 28th, 2007

No Comment

http://link.brightcove.com/services/link/bcpid1126070790/bctid1342090043

http://riggedproductions.com/alchemyst/thealchemyst.mov

November 25th, 2007

I need a vacation (and how I found out I wanted to make Tub so bad)

I’m not going to lie to you. This past week has been hell for me. As you all know, I was competing for a $10,000 grant at massify.com. Thing is, the winner was chosen by online voters. Which means I had to beg people for votes. On top of that, it was Thanksgiving weekend.

During this process, I started up conversations with people I haven’t talked to in years…just to tell them to vote. It was humiliating and I hate the fact that I “broke the silence” with these people over an online voting contest. I realize now, I simply don’t have the stomach for politics. And will never in a million years enter a contest such as this again.

Also: hanging a $10,000 grant in front of a bunch of half-crazed filmmakers is a bad idea. The contest devolved into an online version of “No Country for Old Men”. As we all became monsters trying to get ahold of a suitcase full of money. It curdled my stomach something fierce.

Which gets me to my next subject. My stomach. On thanksgiving day, I returned home with 2 hours of sleep. I had been up the night before making a new pitch video. I somehow survived thanksgiving day. Only to collapse in bed from exhaustion at 6:30pm that night only to wake up at 5am the next day.

I awoke with a pain in my chest. Well, it was in between my stomach and my chest. I didn’t know what was wrong. I figured I was just hungry? But, when I ate. It was still there. I realized that perhaps I had heartburn?

So, Pepcid AC became my new friend. But, that didn’t really work.

I realized, after researching the web:

“Stress contributes significantly to heartburn by reducing the stomach’s ability to protect itself from its own acid. A high-pressure career, stressful family situation, or major life event, such as changing jobs or purchasing a home, can trigger heartburn. Finding good methods of stress relief may help reduce both the frequency and severity of your heartburn episodes.”

Apparently I wanted to make Tub so badly that my body was treating it as a “major life event.” It’s funny how something like this can emotionally and physically destroy you. For the last few days, I’ve had insomnia, anxiety attacks, canker sores (hey, they’re annoying!), the above mentioned heartburn, a near migraine, nausea, etc. etc. I was irritable and out-of-it with friends and family this weekend. I was a wreck.

I need a vacation.


As a side note, out of Pepto, Pepcid Complete, Tums, and Zantac. I think Zantac might be the best (in terms of longevity.) With Pepcid Complete a second.

As for tub. Fear not. I won’t give up. Plan B is now in effect: www.tubthemovie.com

November 14th, 2007

My oldest friend is leaving for Los Angeles next week

Well, I knew this day would come.

Nick Bertonazzi, my friend of 11+ years (holy shit!), is moving to Los Angeles.

He just got a job with the popular Cartoon Network show, “Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends.”

And I couldn’t be more proud of him.

At the beginning of the year, I had the honor of being the best man at Nick’s wedding. In my speech I talked about how we used to make stupid puppet videos in his parent’s basement when we were little. And how that prevented us from having a normal teenage social life. (Translation: We didn’t get the girls.)

I’m glad to see it’s working out for us now.

What’s amazing is that some kid from South Jersey, who was raised on a farm, beat out a gazillion LA industry animators for one single job opening.

Just one.

To this day he is one of the few people who can consistently make me laugh. He’s never been one to ever bullshit me and has always given me his honest opinion on everything. He’s a loyal friend and one of the most talented people I know. This latest development is a dream come true and couldn’t have happened to a better person.

So, while I may miss you, duder. At least I have a place to crash when I visit Los Angeles.

Good luck, buddy. Onward and upward.

View Nick’s web site here.

Nick’s animating pal, Chris Siemasko, made the following picture of Nick and one of the characters of Foster’s. I am not sure why Nick is dressed as a (somewhat gay) pirate in this shot. (Actually, maybe I do…)

November 9th, 2007

Why you shouldn’t work for AT&T’s new tech channel (And how online filmmakers need to stand up for themselves)



The writer’s guild strike is in full swing now.

And I felt it was time for me to speak out about my experiences with online filmmaking.

Prepare for a bit of venom.

I’m going to begin this with a simple email exchange I had recently with a company who posted on Columbia University’s email list that they wanted video content. I’ll only paste the essential parts:

“XXXXXXX is building a global network of producers, directors, writers, experts, and crew members who will work together to build the largest (and best) online library of instructional videos on the planet.

Once you’ve applied and been accepted into our Production Network, XXXXXXX will provide you with assignments based on your specific interests.

For a limited time, XXXXXXX will pay you $60 per approved (2-3 minute) video. ”

$60? For the budget of the film and my payment as a writer/director/editor/producer?

$60??!!!!

Are these people serious?

Folks.

Welcome to the new frontier. The NEW wild wild west of filmmaking.

Online filmmaking.

Unfortunately, filmmakers, being naïve and idealistic have been taken for a ride these past few years. Online companies (aka youtube-esque rip off sites) have told us that we can get “free exposure” by handing over our content. Sadly, this “free exposure” usually amounts to:

Jack shit.

I’ve fallen into this trap for a long time. But, despite where my videos have ended up on the web. Nothing ever happened for me. The only people who benefited were the people who owned the website. Who used my content to sell advertising.

Filmmakers. They are using your content. YOUR content that you busted your ass on. To sell advertising.

DO NOT HAND OVER YOUR CONTENT FOR FREE ANYMORE!

You need to start respecting yourself and the content that you create. Companies are starving to take us out to dinner. We have to let them know we’re not a cheap date any more.

Fast forward to my most recent debacle.

A different scenario this time. This was not an online company like youtube looking for free content. This was a company actually looking to pay for content. And still…it ended badly.

That company is:

AT&T.

I shudder at the name now.

I was hired by AT&T to create funny technology web videos for their upcoming “AT&T tech channel” (techchannel.att.com). My job was two fold actually. I was writing/editing/performing/etc. in live action video work AND also involved in a side animation project.

AT&T originally had a nice sized budget for us.
Then, they cut it down.

Then, they cut down the number of videos they wanted.

What companies like AT&T do is bank off our good will. As filmmakers, we simply want to make good content. That’s why no one stands up for themselves when it comes to money.

Check this out:

AT&T refused to pay for the crews meals in our production budget. Further, they did not want to pay for any of our production costs up front. Not, even half before and half after.

I told this information to my grandmom, who is easily one of the greatest people I know. God bless her, but she knows nothing about video production. When I told her what AT&T was doing, she screwed up her face and said, “Gee Bobby that sounds really fishy.”

You’re damn right it does Grandmom.

So, me and my friends. Who are already struggling financially with loans and all that. Had to pull our money together to fund several videos that cost a few thousand dollars altogether.

Yes. AT&T. A giant corporation. Could not be decent enough to help us cover expenses. Expenses for their project that we were busting our asses on for.

AT&T would refund us the money months later.

And when I say Months. I mean. MONTHS.

Of course with anything, the videos we did were censored and deformed after they got their hands on it. And as far as I know, none of them will ever see the light of day.

After talking to other freelance producers who have worked for AT&T. (Key word HAVE. Past tense.) They all share with me the same story. They had to quit because of the way they were treated. AT&T is literally forcing talented, creative people out the door.

The main reason I was brought into AT&T was to do animated work with my longtime friend Nick Bertonnazi. A marvelously talented animator. (See Mumbaloop.com.) We’ve been talking about making things together since we were little kids. If you were a friend or family member during this time where we first got the AT&T deal you knew how happy we were. It was, without a doubt, a dream come true.

So, they greenlit one of our animated series and officially put us on the payroll.

For a month, we worked on the project. I would write something, and then have to get on a conference call with an AT&T employee, who did not understand it. Lets call this person X.

Anyways, I would get X’s notes and I would rewrite it.

And X would still not understand it.

What’s funny is X greenlit the idea and the specific show ideas. But, now X “didn’t understand the humor of it”.

For a month this goes on. X does a variety of things to me: telling me how X would write it. Criticizing this and that. And it’s painful. Our enthusiasm and good will begin to trickle out the door. It made me very sad.

The final straw during this animation debacle with AT&T was this: A month after beginning work. I wrote X a very sweet letter saying that we really want to make good work for X, but we have no idea what X wants from us anymore. And to please tell us what X wants. We want to make X happy.

X replied a week later (standard procedure) and told us X was shelving the project. X offered us $300 for our time.

$300 split both ways.

We logged in around 25 hours. $150 each was a rate under minimum wage.

Thing is we were on the payroll for a $300 a day rate. (Which sounds like a very nice day rate. But, it’s a trick really. They were going to offer us a week or two of this day rate as payment for the completed project. Even though the project would take 2 months to complete.)

So, lets back the train up here.

X did not owe us $150 each. X owed us $937.50 each. (25 hours divided by an 8 hour work day = 3.125 x 300 a day.)

I nicely told X that I regretted X’s decision to shelve the project for now, but that I can’t wait to work with X in the near future. I also let X know that the price was a bit unreasonable and told X the hours I worked. I was painfully nice.

X didn’t respond to my email.

A week goes by and I hear back X loves the other videos we did.

I email X. Painfully nice. And tell X I’m glad X liked the videos. “Did you reconsider our payment?”

I hear nothing from X for two weeks..

I email X a stronger worded letter and give the exact hours I worked. Line by line stating what I did during those hours.

Suddenly, X gets back to me the next morning. (Odd considering X usually waits a week or two to respond.) X says, “Oh wait. You confused what I was saying. I meant $300 each.” No. X didn’t mean that. I even confirmed with an another employee at the time that X definitely meant $150 each and X was definitely not budging from that number.

The money X was giving us was arbitrary. The equivalent of a “fuck off, here’s a few bucks.”

This arbitrary attitude toward my online video work is exactly what is wrong with online filmmaking! There are no rules! EVERYTHING is arbitrary!

Anyways.
I politely ask X if I could see X in his office to talk about this. Just for a few minutes. Whenever it’s convenient for X.

X tells me that X doesn’t have time for that. That this matter can be handled without seeing each other in person. That it doesn’t need X’s full attention.

X refuses to be a decent person and just talk to me like a human being about this.

I then spoke to a Lawyer. The lawyer told me:
“You have an open shut case in small claims court.”

I let X know that. I also let X know that X had the weekend to think about this. If I don’t get the money I’m owed I will take X to small claims court.

That Monday I get an email. A very disparaging email. For a few paragraphs, X tells me my logic is inconsistent. But, ends with. “Despite these inconstancies, Im going to give you the money you claimed you are owed.”

And despite X’s disparing words. X paid up.

You must agree: Actions speak louder than words.

The fact is. Without us. The online filmmakers. These companies are nothing. What’s X gonna do? Make a film on X’s own? Good luck!

It’s time that these companies know this and respect us for it. We do good work! Lets not sell ourselves short anymore!

The happy ending to this story is that I was recently hired by NextNewNetworks.com to do commercial work for them. Y’know what their note was for me at the start?

“Do whatever you want.”

I did. And they actually respect my work! What the-? It’s like being in a bad relationship and then getting into a new one and being like: “Why did I put up with that before?” (You can check out the next new videos here: Funnyordie.com/bobbynextnew)

The thing is I’m damned proud to be working for NextNewNetworks. Because they seem to simply get it. Not only that, but if you look at the shows they create. Every single one of them is quality.

How do they do it? It’s simple. They let the artists do their thing. They understand how the process works. And they actually pay them for their time. People watch. Everyone wins.

X and the folks at AT&T should really check out NextNew Networks business model.

In summary. If you, as an online filmmaker, or an artist in general don’t respect your work enough to be compensated for your time. Then, you don’t respect yourself.

You should respect yourself more.

It’s time to join that picket line.

November 7th, 2007

HOLY FUCK

http://www.apple.com/trailers/paramount_vantage/therewillbeblood/

I’ve been waiting for this film to come out since Punch Drunk Love (2002).

I wish PT Anderson made more movies. He is, without a doubt, my favorite living director right now.

This one looks fucking epic.

Aiieeeeee. I would do something illegal to see this movie before it’s release date (December 26th).

November 3rd, 2007

Don’t buy your songs from itunes ANYMORE!

Guys!

I feel like a fool for buying stuff on itunes!

I just discovered Amazon’s mp3 downloading service.

CHECK THIS OUT:

* Amazon is cheaper. (Consistently a few dollars LESS than itunes on EVERY ALBUM I’VE BOUGHT THERE.)

* Amazon offers twice the audio resolution. (Itunes stuff is mostly 128kbs, Amazon is 256kbs)

* Amazon has NO COPYRIGHT PROTECTION RESTRICTIONS (AKA “DRM”). (Itunes won’t allow you to share your music with friends unless they are authorized to do so. Amazon has no such restrictions!)

How does it work? Easy. You download a little application that runs on PC or Mac. Then, do a search on amazon for mp3s. Find your album. Download it, pay for it. The application opens up and starts the downloading process for you. And even better: it automatically imports your songs into itunes for you. Open up itunes: BOOM your 256kps, non copyright protected, cheaper mp3s ARE ALL THERE!

What are you waiting for?

Amazon.com that shit!

October 28th, 2007

there’s blood in my tub

Last night I went out to a bunch of Halloween parties. For my costume, I had the brillaint idea of creating a massive headwound by using giant globs of liquid latex and then sticking it to the back of my head. It gave the appearance that my brain was coming out of my skull. (Of course this was all topped with about two tubes of fake blood)

It looked awesome. And even better, a few brave girls even felt like poking at my bloodied fake brain. (Others, however, were a bit…. Shall we say…disgusted by the whole prospect.)

But, throughout the night, a feeling of dread washed over me.

“Bobby”, I thought. “I don’t think this stuff’s gonna come out too easily.”

Today I got a shower and of course the tub is covered in fake blood. (Which was an interesting experience to say the least.) But, y’know what’s stickin to me like glue?

My fake brain.

Turns out, after perusing a bunch of liquid latex sites. (Most of them dedicated to using the material in some type of sex act.) I find out. Quite clearly. The following: “Do NOT use this in hair.”

Notice the “NOT” all in caps.

Yeah, all the sites seem to phrase it that way.

So, while I know you probably all are going to rush out and pour mounds of liquid latex on your head anyway. (As I know ALL OF YOU must be rushing out to create massive head wounds.) Please heed my advice:

You better really like liquid latex stuck in your hair for a long time.

Sadly, all I have is this crappy phone photo of my makeup job. Why I didn’t take a proper photo after spending an hour or so on it…is beyond me!

LATE ADDITION!
Apparently, baby oil and a comb may get liquid latex out of your hair. I am not sure though. Anyways, I am now leaving the house in search of such items. I will be wearing a hoodie over my head wound.

This is really silly.

October 26th, 2007

Goodbye Facebook and Myspace

Late last night I had an epiphany.

Why the fuck am I on facebook and myspace?

Think about it.

There’s no real reason.

If anything, I think these sites cause damage to human relationships. How many times have you posted a comment on someone’s page just to keep in contact with that person? Why not just give them a call like a real human being? Or even an email? Why post a vapid comment when you can give them something substantial in a personalized email?

Why post something that only you and that person will understand, only for it to be publicized to the whole world?

What is the point of that? It makes no logical sense.

No generation before us has had to deal with such a vapid artificial idea of “social networking”. Myspace and facebook are not social networking. They are socially damaging.

Facebook for example. They publish a newsfeed as to what your relationship status is. A year ago, I broke up with someone and I got to see a newsfeed about it. To me, that’s completely immoral. And I don’t need that type of invasion of privacy in my life anymore. (I feel so strongly about this that a track on my album is dedicated to it: thebmillproject.com)

Further, these sites ruin the fun of real life! Countless times I have met a person, only to visit their page and know everything about them. Favorite movies. Favorite music. Etc. I’m missing out on getting to know a person and being surprised by it! Quite frankly: these sites ruin the fun and surprise of meeting someone new!

In fact, I’m contemplating whether I want to still keep this blog. I think I want a more private life. My friends and family get to know the real me. And anyone who wants to get to know me, can get to know me. In the same way human beings have been doing it for centuries now. By saying “hi” and talking to me.

No more artificial intelligence.

**** 10/27/07 ADDITION ****

So, I take it my sudden frenzied reaction against facebook and myspace might come off a little…well… “crazy”. However, Kyle sent me an email today containing a blog entry from musician Jens Lekman.

Apparently he has quit myspace too. And wrote about it in his blog.

It reads:

August 13th, 2007

Jens Lekman is now 23 years old and lives in the United States, he’s
single and his starsign is Taurus. I finally cancelled my MySpace
account some time ago and someone grabbed it instantly. Get to know
the younger American me: www.myspace.com/jenslekman

I abandoned MySpace back in February, or rather kidnapped it to my
own domains. I felt it was an insult to everything I loved about
popmusic. Everything that is unique and personal. I really tried to
do something with it, I tried an audio diary, I tried communicating
with people, but in the end the communication just felt so stupid
and meaningless. And I can’t help but feel like it’s really
designed for this purpose. I mean you don’t sell cellphone signals
to people who are discussing something creative or intelligent. I
started feeling like a stock trader rather than a human, watching
strange faces flicker by and clicking on the add button, add, add,
add…. I have 12.442 friends how many friends do you have ?

Maybe I was aiming a bit too high, maybe MySpace simply is what it
is - a giant billboard where you can write your name in the corner.
I’m not too concerned with it, the whole Rupert Murdoch deal and all
that, I just decided it was the opposite of Jens Lekman and so I
left, I didn’t even slam the door behind me. But something so
uncontroversial turned out to be extremely controversial as my
inbox filled up with angry e-mails. The site was still up there but
it was empty, I didn’t wanna give it up cause I thought someone
would take the address and make it a fake Jens Lekman. Like they’ve
done on Facebook and Friendster etc. And people kept clicking the
add button, add, add, add… why the hell don’t you add me ? What
is this anti-effort you’re engaging in ?

As soon as I had cancelled the account and been replaced by the 23
year old me I realised how lovely it was to have all these replicas
of me wandering around the internet. Just like I’ve lately embraced
all the misinterpretations in media, all the misquotings, the
rumours and misunderstandings. It’s beautiful. It’s out of my
control and it’s such a central point in me and my music. She said
it was make-believe, I thought she said Mapleleaves… Actually I
would like to encourage you all to create as many fake Jens Lekmans
as you want. But don’t send them to me, send them off in a new
direction.

I’m here, always. If you want me to add you, send me an e-mail and
I’ll write your name on the back of my hand.

With flavour of passionfruit,
Jens Lekman